As part of the Youth Portfolio series, the author sent 3 series, of which we have selected for publication the one titled Deficiencies.
In it, the author touches on a number of problems that she is not the only one facing. She is painfully affected by the unexpected departure of both her parents, and seeks rescue and solace in photography and social media. The latter fail her severely. So much so that she decided to make this the subject of her photo series. As it turns out, the "deficiencies" of the title suffer, more than she does, from strangers with whom she made contact through social media. These were men interested in establishing only a very superficial acquaintance related only to sex.
As one can guess from the screenshots accompanying the photograph, this was not what Catherine had in mind, not what she was looking for at this point in her life. She was looking for a man for whom she would simply be a person in need of help in a difficult life situation. The story described and shown once again reveals the superficial and completely unsatisfying nature of the virtual ties offered by the digital world. Nothing can replace close third-degree encounters. Nothing can replace a helping hand, the hand of a close and real person who can always be counted on.
Here is what Katarzyna Zawadzka wrote about her series:
My project began with insecurity.
This sense of security for me is self-confidence, self-acceptance, belonging to social groups such as family, professional group, friends, as well as health and financial security. Through the events that happened in my life, the death of my parents, my balance was shattered. I was left alone. Deficiencies arose.
Functioning in the real world, for the moment, was too difficult for me. I then created two worlds for myself. One real, which symbolized me, the other surreal, which symbolized a hypothetical person. The link, the medium, between these two worlds was the hand. The hand for me is a symbol of security, holding the hand gives support, stability, balance, closeness. I began to search for a hypothetical person in the virtual world. And so began my new journey in search of the missing elements of me. I tried to establish any kind of relationship with another person, however, it turned out that I could not find a common language with others. Most of the registered people are looking for casual sexual contacts, often they are bored husbands, people with preferences different from the normative ones, seducers or incelebrities. These people being on the other side of the "mirror" can be who they want to be, what they want to be. They usually vent their frustrations, failures in life, by being not very nice, insulting, ridiculing. Often, too, if I managed to make contact, the contact broke off for no apparent reason. I got the impression that people using this type of portals, rely on short, fleeting acquaintanceships that do not require their efforts, commitments, commitment. My expectations and those of the people I met were slipping away. I was looking for someone to fill my gaps, related to a sense of security, self-confidence, I was offered something different. The virtual world turned out to be an illusion. I came to the conclusion that I had to fill my gaps myself. I went out of the colorful and pretty virtual world into the real world, which is gray and ugly, but real and the only one that is real.
Katarzyna Zawadzka - A graduate of the Studium ZPAF, from which she graduated with honors. In December 2021, after approval of the Art Council, she joined the ranks of the Union of Polish Artists Photographers. She has won many photographic competitions, participated in many exhibitions, and was also involved in amateur theater.
